People Pleaser, much?

I was listening to a sermon by John Bevere on being a people more worried about pleasing others than pleasing God. I must say, one of my greatest and worst characteristics is to lift one's spirit through kind words, yet, sometimes I think I do it in order to feed a deep desire for people to be pleased with me and to like me, and to not leave me. He spoke of things that devastated my desire for self elevation, such as, whomever your source is, is whom you will serve. And it is that source that you will try not to offend. So if you're connected to God and he is your source then you work to please him and not offend him with your lifestyle...in the same manor if man is your source you work to please and not offend man...which is more important? I know the right answer and my answer...sadly, they don't line up, though I'm getting them in line.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"So...are you really okay?"

I have been hearing that a lot recently, and I think it's odd, because I have truly not been as good as I am right now, in a long time...as it goes for happiness level.

So for the last couple months I have been seeking what I should do next and it's a tad daunting to think of...actually really daunting, but I was reading a book by Shane Claiborne that really spoke to the depth of my heart yesterday and changed my heart motive of prayer for my future. The book was speaking about vision and how the greatest leaders have vision that will positively affect the people with whom they lead...they can see positive change for the world and then live it out. A truly powerful concept. As I was chewing on that, I began to ask myself what my vision is and I couldn't answer. You see, I have been praying for what will effect my next season, or what job to take, or where to live, but I think I was missing it. I believe God is saying, "Emma, find your vision and align your future in that."

The Lord is good and His mercy endures forever. The Lord is good.

Ramblings...

I feel like today might be a rambling....a rambling of God thoughts I have been having. I think that's okay, because when my mind goes 90 mph with God, it has no room for other things...it may lack direction, but it is not without zeal.

In the rumblings of my spirit, I feel the undertone of something great going to happen. I don't know what that means, or what that will look like, but I feel it. When I got home from Jonesboro, one of my neighbors came out and said, "Something great is going to happen to you...I can feel it" I received it, with open arms.

Yesterday in church the pastor spoke on something that really ministered to me. He was speaking of Jesus' encounter with Peter, specifically when he was called to be a fisher of men. He asked the question, "What happened to the fish?" When Peter, who's worldly identity was a fisherman, had the best catch of his life, it says he left all he had and followed the Lord. Pastor Li, then challenged the body in this: If you were given everything in your earthly identity...you had the catch of your life...would you be able to leave it all and find your truest identity in Jesus.

GLORAYYYYY!

I have been spending time focusing in on what is the next step in my life. I don't know yet, but I'm seeking the face of God right now in order to find out. I am seeing myself as more of an administrator these days, because I can't seem to find my vision, but I know when I do figure it out, I can put into action.

Esther

My mother recently challenged me to do a study on the people in the Bible who had a call on their life. She recommended this because, I have a bit of an issue with finding my purpose in life and truly understanding my calling.

So I began my journey in Esther. I'm only in chapter 4 of the book I have read so very many times before, but I'm seeing so much.

The power of Faith, faith in a God who isn't even mentioned in the book. Mordecai, truly amazes me. He believed in Esther long before Esther believed in Esther. He encouraged her to go, talked to her daily, and began to birth within her the vision of God's heart. A good father(uncle) is what he was. Someone who captured the heart of God and inspired his child to do the same.

For my Calvinist friends, I also believe predestination is a huge part of this story. God had a plan and he fulfilled it...for my Armenians I see that there was free will involved. Esther didn't have to go into the king's chambers and beg for her people, but she chose to knowing it was worth everything.

Preparation is key to this story as well. Everything is done within a certain and appropriate order.

Finally, I have noticed that the calling is not without hardship...The Jewish people were about to be annihilated, Mordecai was in deep anguish, Haman will die, and the king was embarrassed by Vashti...but this pain all led to the end purpose of God...interesting eh?

I'm still learning and still growing in understanding, but I am truly enjoying the revelation I have been given, thus far.

Change

Nine months ago, nearly to do the day, my life fell into a season of change, and it's changing and changing, and changing. Nothing seems to be the same anymore except for one thing, one constant, and that would be, of course, my Savior, Jesus Christ. Always faithful to the end as Cory Asbury might say.

A snapshot of where I have been:

After returning home from a mission trip to Australia, which radically shook my paradigm of God and threw him out of the box, of which I put Him in, one of my dearest friends tragically ended his life. This changed everything for me. After following the calling of the Lord, I ended up moving a couple hours away from Jonesboro and living in now what I call my home, Little Rock.

In the last 6 months of living there I have had a blast, I got a job as server and bartender, I was able to be close to my best friend who is probably the best part of me, and I have become a part of a church that shares the same heart that I have for the world.

But for the last month, my heart has ached, and I have found myself falling into a deep pit of what I thought was unknown despair, yet after much prayer and mentoring I'm realizing it was more of a pit I dug for myself.

There are two things I have seen in my life:

1. I put hope in people not in God

2. I have lived a right life yet have not lived in deep righteousness

1.

I have believed in healing and help for people who did not receive it. I believed people were inherently better than they actually are, and when they fall, I become uncontrollably disappointed.

2.

I granted myself "grace"...I allowed my life to be permissible yet not beneficial for my total life. As Poet Ezekiel would say a right-ish life instead of a righteous life.

So here's where I stand, in a life always changing, yet with eyes directly on my Lord. I can't stop the change, but I can adapt.

The Gift

The Gift

Open your ears and open your eyes; put out your dainty hands and take a hold of mine. For, I want to lead you, and I want you to follow.

Open your ears and open your eyes; put out your dainty hand and take a hold of mine. For I have a gift I want to give you. This is a gift from above to you below. Use this gift liberally and tell everyone you know, who the Giver was.

Open your ears and open your eyes; put your dainty hands and take a hold of mine. Your carnal mind cannot receive the gift I now pour on thee. A gift for the masses, a gift for just one, to be harnessed and shared with everyone.

Open your ears and open your eyes; put out your dainty hands and take a hold of mine. I'll speak to you in your terms. Be a mother to the motherless, a father to the fatherless. Remove your stereotypes and give My gift like I am watching.

Open your ears and open your eyes; put your dainty hands and take a hold of mine.
LOVE.

Emily Gnagey
10-13-09

What is worship?

I believe it's John Piper who says, " Missions exist because worship doesn't." I think that's a great point, and a great quote considering those two things are what make my heart beat. I love worship and I love missions. Missions is easy to understand, you give hope to anyone who needs it by sharing the hope you have in Christ...In the art world that would be like realism. But when we start talking about worship it becomes more abstract, and even maybe a little non-objective. The definitions of worship aren't great, its people's version of how they worship. But I don't think that's what worship is.

I was reading in Revelation 19 and in verses 9 and 10 it says this.

Then the angel said to me, "Write 'Blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb!' " And he added, "These are the true words of God"

At this I fell at his feet to worship him. But he said to me, "Do not do it! I am a fellow servant with you and with your brothers who hold to the testimony of Jesus. Worship God! For the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy."

I believe this is what worship is. And there are three points that I see, as I take a look at this passage.

1. BE AT THE WEDDING SUPPER!

This should be the obvious, but to truly worship God, we must know him intimately and know for sure that when Christ comes back and takes His bride, we are a part of that group. We must embody the spirit of a member of the Bride of Christ.

2. INVITE THOSE AROUND YOU TO BE AT THE WEDDING FEAST AS WELL.

It doesn't necessarily say that here, but I believe that is the implication. The time is short tell everyone you know about that hope you have in Christ and make sure they are sitting at the head table of the wedding feast with you and all the other believers.

3. WORSHIP GOD!

This is one of the most important parts of this verse. As I read about John falling to worship at the feet of the angel and the angel saying, "get up" I realized we as Christians do this all the time. We worship the things of God, but in our prideful service worship, we forget to just admire God and fall at his feet. Think about it, why do you love worship? It's the feeling you get when you are in the presence of God, isn't it? I submit that it is not worship, its a part of worship, and a part of God, but not true worship. We worship the emotions we get when sing. No! Worship is a lifestyle of daily(every moment of the day) gift of bestowing glory to God, because "His name and His renown are the desires of my heart." - Isaiah 26:8.


This is what I say. What do you think?